What's Your Business Sign?

Instead of star signs, what's your business sign?


You are ambitious yet stupid. You chose a marketing degree
to avoid having to study in college, concentrating instead on drinking
and socializing which is pretty much what your job responsibilities are
now. Least compatible with sales.


Laziest of all signs, often referred to as "marketing without
a degree." You are also self centered and paranoid. Unless someone
calls you and begs you to take their money, you like to avoid contact with
customers so you can "concentrate on the big picture." You seek admiration
for your golf game throughout your life.


Unable to control anything in your personal life, you are
instead content to completely control everything that happens at your
workplace. Often even you don't understand what you are saying but
who can tell. It is written that Geeks shall inherit the Earth.


One of only two signs that is actually studied in
school. It is said that 90% of all personal ads are placed by engineers.


The only other sign that is studied in school. You are
mostly immune from office politics. You are the most feared person in the
organization; combined with your extreme organizational traits, the
majority of rumours concerning you, say that you are completely insane.

Human Resources

Ironically, given your access to confidential
information, you tend to be the biggest gossip within the organization.
Possibly the only other person that does less work than marketing, you are unable
to return any calls today because you have to get a haircut and eat lunch.

Management and Middle Management

Catty, cut-throat, yet completely
spineless, you are destined to remain at your current job for the
rest of your life. Unable to make a single decision you tend to measure your
worth by the number of meetings you can schedule for yourself.
Romantically compatible with other middle managers as everyone in your
social circle is a middle manager.

Senior Management

See above. Same sign, different title.

Customer Service

Cheery, positive, you are a bus ride away from
taking your own life. As children very few of you asked your parents for a
little cubicle for your room and a headset so you could pretend to play
"customer service". Continually passed over for promotions, your best bet is
to sleep with your manager.


Lacking any specific knowledge, you use acronyms to avoid
revealing your utter lack of experience. You have convinced yourself
that your skills are in demand and that you could get a higher paying job
with any other organization in a heartbeat. You will spend an eternity
contemplating these career opportunities without ever taking direct


As a person that profits from the success of others, you
are disdained by most people who actually work for a living. Paid on
commission and susceptible to alcoholism, your ulcers and frequent heart
attacks correspond directly with fluctuations in the stock market.

Partner, President or CEO

You are brilliant or lucky. Your inability
to understand complex systems such as the fax machine suggests the

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Text: Author Unknown
Music: I Saw The Sign ~ Ace of Base


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