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If
Microsoft Built Cars
At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared
the computer industry with the auto industry and stated that :-
"If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry
has, we would all be driving twenty-five dollar cars that got
1000 miles to the gallon."
In response to Gates' comments, General Motors issued a press
release stating:
If GM had developed technology like Microsoft, we would all be
driving cars with the following characteristics:
1. For no reason whatsoever your car would crash twice a day.
2. Every time they repainted the lines on the road you would
have to buy a new car.
3. Occasionally your car would die on the freeway for no reason,
and you would just accept this, restart and drive on.
4. Occasionally, executing a maneuver such as a left turn, would
cause your car to shut down and refuse to restart, in which case
you would have to reinstall the engine.
5. Only one person at a time could use the car, unless you bought
"Car98" or "CarNT". But then you would have
to buy more seats.
6. Macintosh would make a car that was powered by the sun, reliable,
five times as fast, and twice as easy to drive, but would only
work on five percent of the roads.
7. The oil, water temperature and alternator warning lights would
be replaced by a single "general car default" warning
light.
8. New seats would force everyone to have the same size butt.
9. The airbag system would say "Are you sure?" before
going off.
10. Occasionally for no reason whatsoever, your car would lock
you out and refuse to let you in until you simultaneously lifted
the door handle, turned the key, and grab hold of the radio antenna.
11. GM would require all car buyers to also purchase a deluxe
set of Rand McNally road maps (now a GM subsidiary), even though
they neither need them nor want them. Attempting to delete this
option would immediately cause the car's performance to diminish
by 50% or more. Moreover, GM would become a target for investigation
by the Justice Department.
12. Every time GM introduced a new model car buyers would have
to learn to drive all over again because none of the controls
would operate in the same manner as the old car.
13. You'd press the "start" button to shut off the
engine.
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Anonymous ~ User Submitted
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