Southern slang, or
"Hickphonics," as a language
is to be taught in all Southern schools.
Here are excerpts from the Hickphonics/ English dictionary:
HEIDI - noun. Greeting.
- Complete sentence. Remainder of greeting. Usage: "Heidi.
- verb. Past tense of the infinitive "to borrow." Usage:
"My brother bard my pickup truck."
- noun. A state just north of Florida. Capital is Hot-lanta. Usage:
"My brother from Jawjuh bard my pickup truck."
- noun. A calendar division. Usage: "My brother from Jawjuh
bard my pickup truck, and I ain't herd from him in munts.
- noun. A conflagration. Usage: "If my brother from Jawjuh
don't change the all in my pickup truck, that things gonna catch
- noun. A supervisor. Usage: "If you don't stop reading these
Southern words and git back to work, your bahs is gonna far you!"
- noun. A tall monument. Usage: "Lord willin' and the creek
don't rise, I sure do hope to see that Eiffel Tire in Paris sometime."
- Verb. To stop working. Usage: "My grampaw retard at age
- adverb. Exhausted. Usage: "I just flew in from Hot-lanta,
and boy my arms are tarred."
- pronoun. Possessive case of we used as a predicate adjective.
- noun. Entitled power or privilege. Usage: "We Southerners
are willin' to fat for are rats."
- adjective. Not local. Usage: "I cuddint unnerstand a wurd
he sed ... must be from some farn country."
- adjective. Not alive. Usage: "He's did, Jim."
- noun. A colorless, odorless gas (unless you are in LA). Usage:
"He cain't breathe ... give 'im some ear!"
BOB WAR - noun. A sharp, twisted
cable. Usage: "Boy, stay away from that bob war fence."
- Noun and verb contraction. Usage: "Jew here that my brother
from Jawjuh got a job with that bob war fence cump'ny?"
- a contraction. Usage: "Is Bubba smart?" "Nah
... haze ignert."
- verb, past tense. Usage: "Bubba seed are bard pick-up."
- Noun. A bureaucratic institution. Usage: "Them gummit boys
shore are ignert."
HERE TO SEND THIS GREETING255
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